Sometimes you only realize the importance of school life after you start working. I don't dread the long working hours now because I know I am earning $ for my university fees, what I dislike is that the outside world is so saddening, it is depressing. After I talked to , LiLeng, my colleague who is younger than me, i realise the younger now are experiencing my than I did but sadly the more that you noe the worse you feel. I never thought the world could be so complicated, even though the others often said so. I choose to believe everything is simple, perhaps due to the influence of the mass media that paints a beautiful picture of the world.

Perhaps i am not wise or worldly enough for my own good or perhaps 5 years down the road i would realise the decisions i had make are actually beneficial to my future. I don't go for instant gratification. Perhaps thats why i gave up alot of chances. I always say, its beacause of studies i choose to give up this and that but probably this is just an excuse i am giving myself to make myself feel better. Maybe I am just following the simple formula that i/ society thinks is right and will lead me to happiness. What do i want? I don't really understand at this age but i know for sure, it is to better life and to live in search of the purpose of life :)